I almost DIED

Old people should have to take driving tests. I was almost killed by an old man driver today.

On a happier note...

You ever had a day where you go to school and everyone looks the same? Do you ever feel like you see bump-it's everywhere? Do you ever get frustrated with people's statuses on Facebook? An any-kind-of-day solution has been around for hundreds of years!!

Turns any day into a great day!

Oh the things we wish we never had to see...

Was at a theme park today. Saw a woman in a white onesie, just got off a water ride and it was clear that she was wearing nothing beneath the onesie. Here's today's lesson: White requires underclothes. And for those of you who do this knowing what you are showing, here's today's lesson: Despite what you think, no one appreciates it. You automatically enter everyone's mind as a disgusting, sick, desperate person.

10 things I hate about Utah

Warning: This might get personal

1. Snow in April. Once Winter is over, there should never be a day in Spring or Summer that is colder than any day was in the Winter time span.

2. The cloned girls. Let's get some variety!

3. My dog is not here.

4. If I'm in Utah, I'm in school.

5. Deer poop.

6. The bottomless sink.

7. The Drivers who have no respect for the lives of others...or themselves, it seems.

8. The half rain/snow slush that ruins even the best of days.

9. The wind is just ridiculous.

10. The poster-bearing Mormon protesters whose signs actually parallel with Mormon beliefs, but they know so little about what they are protesting that they don't even realize they are agreeing with it.




I want my dog.




This is what every girl in Utah looks like. Fake blonde, huge bump on top of and behind head, just imagine a really bad fake tan.

Things That Bother Me Today

1. That one person in my class who always says something to spark controversy, as it is the only way they can find attention.
2. That one person in my other class who is constantly making terrible jokes in the hopes that one day there will be one that everyone (or at least someone) laughs at. Actually there are two of those people.
3. People who join Facebook groups in the attempt to break a world record of Facebook group membership. Will you really feel accomplished to be one of a million people who were able to join the group from their home computers with the click of a button? Might as well be the laziest attempt at a world record record.
4. Heavy Metal Music.
5. Girls who use leggings as a replacement for pants. I actually have a list of all their creative uses with said clothing, soon to be posted. Look for it soon!

Things That Are Ridiculous

There is a group on facebook called "♥ 60 THINGS A GIRL WOULD WANT BUT WONT ASK FOR ♥ (this is so cute!)" Yes, (this is so cute!) is included in the group name. I would just like to point out that these are things certain types of girls do ask for, the same type I imagine who would write this list. Hence, they wrote this list. Here is what is wrong with it:

Signs of Girls being Needy:
4. Give her 1 of your sweatshirts: this is almost as annoying as girls who take a guy's suit jacket during church and wear it in Relief Society or Young Women's. You're not cold, or in "love," you just want to be marked territory.
25. Kiss her in front of OTHER girls you know
51. HOLD her HAND in PUBLIC.

Signs of A Guy being Clingy:
9. Invite her everywhere.
10. Hangout with her and your friends together.
13. Pull her onto your lap.
14. When she says she loves you more, deny it. Fight back: I can't believe these conversations exist.
15. When her friends say i love her more than you, deny it. fight back and hug her tight so she can't get to her friends. it makes her feel loved.
29. Text messege or call her in the morning and tell her have a good day at work {or school}, and how much you MISS her: Spelling.
30. Be there for her when ever she needs you, & even when she doesn't need you, just be there so she'll know that she can ALWAYS count on you.
41. Call or text her EVERY night to wish her SWEET DREAMS.


45. Sit on top of her and tell her how much u love her and then bend down to her face and kiss her while sitting on her: Yes, girls love to be sat on.


52. Even if she looks BAD one day tell her she's BEAUTIFUL: Correct me if I'm wrong but, I'm assuming the desperate sort of girl who dreams of a boy being relentlessly in love with would also expect him to always see her as beautiful, no matter what.

WE MIGHT DENY IT BUT WE ACTUALLY LIKE IT AND KINDA WANT YOU TO TICKLE US: As a girl, I can personally testify that if anyone ever tries to tickle me, they will not wake up the following morning.

57. Pick her up like in The Notebook and kiss her: The Notebook is overrated, and I would never choose the guy with a beard. Be more creative, don't be guided by movies. Also, how many guys have actually seen it?

59. Don't ignore her or be nerveous around her--everything is going to be okay: SPELLING!!!!

To sum up, there are over 400,000 people who have no respect for the English language, as they joined this group. They also have no respect for themselves. The girl who founded the group posted almost 300 pictures of herself as "group pictures" and is a desperate,vain, boy-hungry, illiterate fool.

Desperate, foolish, annoying. Likes the idea of a boyfriend more than the one she obtains. Likes to flaunt said boyfriend. Sound familiar?

Things I Hate Today

• About 1/2 the statuses on Facebook.
  
• Bump Its. Although, by all means, keep wearing them BYU female population! If you want to look ridiculous all the time, I am fine with that.
• People making out in the basement lobby of my hall. Be more creative, we like to use that lobby and will go to any awkward lengths to get it.
• Ugg boots with sweat pants.
  

Yes Please!